Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead

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Moe: What's the difference between blue paint and red paint? Ben: I couldn't tell you, I'm blind. Moe was so embarrassed by his unintentional rudeness that he apologized to Ben and walked away.

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What do you call a generally un likeable person who has a habit of drinking in a bar? A Bastard.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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I like it in the butt. - Tyler James Nehring. Call me if you want to give me the d. 863-670-1547

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How did my grand parents go about surviving the holocaust? Well, for starters, they weren't Jewish, they never lived in Germany, and to be honest, my grandparents probably would have supported the Nazi's because they are right wing pricks

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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what's the last thing you want to hear during surgery? your wife complaining

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the asian kid gets an F

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs is both the same.

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A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

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Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

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What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

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What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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