today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

96

What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

Why did the man die? He had a heart attack.

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

Knock Knock *opens the door*

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

9

i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

I killed someone today. :D

What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

What you reading? reading?

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

Roses are pink. Violets are pink. The brony just took a dump. Don't give me that shit!

What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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