How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

Hey, how much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to drown as a result of climate change.

how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

One below was by me: Walter H

What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

Q. Why do Italian men have mustaches? A. So they can look like their mothers.

yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

What did the fat girl say to the good looking guy? Nothing. She didn't have the self-confidence to go up to him.

Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I said so.

Q: what's red, green and goes over 100 miles per hour? A: a frog in a blender

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...