I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

No.

How do you scare a blonde woman? Tie her up and mutilate her family while she watches.

Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

TIMMAH!

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

What do you call a person who dies in march A dead person

So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

What do you call a Jew and a black mans offspring? A human

Gay's

Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

What is more worse than death? Death

Who thinks amy mc quire is really stuiped

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

your mom died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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