How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

52 Prostitutes in a bar. Challenge Accepted.

hahahahaha thats not funny

what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was hungry. Thats why.

why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

Two black men are sitting next to each other on a bench when a woman walks by. The first man says "Damn, that's a nice pair of tits!". The second man said "Yes, she does posses a supple and voluptuous bosom." The cat that was sitting underneath the bench then began cleaning himself.

My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

Q.What do you call a beaver with a unibrow. A. A beaver........it's still a beaver

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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