How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

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A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

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why did arno fly away? he was a bird

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Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

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A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

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There once was a man from nantucket. But he moved to California after he won the State lottery.

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what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

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you know what is so funny?! jokes..................................

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you know whats funny... nothing.

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So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

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What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

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How did the blonde get Lost in her house? Netflix.

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I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

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Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

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Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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