What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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What happened when the black man was pushed off the cliff? His bones shattered upon impact and he died almost instantly

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

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Dylan is gay

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Ask this to your friend. "Yo man, I really need your help on this question. Can you tell me color comes after 9?" guaranteed "wtf"

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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knock knock. Who's there... Mormans

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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In Soviet Russia, table flip you! ???? ? /(. - . \?

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What do you call a black girl scout? A brownie

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There are two muffins in an oven. The first muffin says, "Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?". The second one says, "Hey, look! A talkin' muffin!".

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

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What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

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Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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