I pooped.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does Spiderman do everyday? Aunt May

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +5

can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" as his FaceBook status, and all his friends were annoyed.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

President Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops