a person smokes weed... and gets high

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

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What's the different between a trampoline and a baby? You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.

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Help I'm being raped!

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Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

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bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

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What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

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Hey, wanna hear a penis joke? Nevermind, it's too long.

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

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Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

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dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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