my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

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Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

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how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

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Justin Bieber got laid

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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you know whats funny... nothing.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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Q. If Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were both drowning, what kind would you make? A. PBJ

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How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

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Show me the money! Said the man last wednesday.

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

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What is a chair?

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A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

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What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

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Why was the women's basketball player laughed at. The slippery floor caused her to stumble and fall.

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What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops