Your mom is so stupid, that she took an IQ test and was proven mentally retarded. Her family is devastated.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

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What's black and white and red all over? Two biracial gay guys boning a can of paint...

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Irrelevant. The road is no place for chickens.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

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Give me thumbs up!

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What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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What's worrying about a middle-eastern man on a plane? The fact you are worrying about it.

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Women's rights.

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Joe Alfon walkes into hell, The devil say: " hi" And joe burns to death

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

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Q:What did the Black man say to New York? A: Black Out.

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One watermelon said the the other watermelon, "you are looking mighty plump today", the other watermelon didn't say anything because watermelons cant talk

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops