what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

-Wanna hear a joke? -Not really -Oh

Cows are land manatees.

The Christian Bible.

This would be racist to black people if they could read.

Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

Why did the elephants get in a taxi? They were going to the airport.

Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

A 2 lb ball and a 10 lb ball are dropped at the same time. Which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground first. Go ahead and try it. Go on. Now. If you are still reading you really want to know if anything else is going to happen. Well nothing exciting. Just a potato. 0 looks like a potato

Why are their so many lesbians? cause they LOVE the pussy.. (Tastes soo wet and tight)

Why did the pirate say to the donkey? Rrrrrrrrrrr you a donkey?

Answer The Following!! Q: How Do You Kill Bee?? Q: What Do You Call A Bee Who Live In America?? Q: Why Don't You Give Elsa A Balloon??

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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