Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

BOTTOM!!!

If life gives you lemons ask where they came from.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

What do you call a room full of Jews? A gas chamber.

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic..

penis

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window, at the 122th floor of a skyskraper.

Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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A dog walks into a bar. the owner of the bar didn't allow animal in his bar and he helped the dog outside again

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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