So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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matt f stupid because no one likes him

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you know what is so funny?! jokes..................................

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Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

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Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

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What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

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A man sat on a chair

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What happened after jimmy cheated on a test. Jimmy went home.

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whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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AIDS

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

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What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

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rishi is gay (coventry england)

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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What do you call two black men and a hispanic man in the back of a car? The punchline of this joke is offensive, and might bring legal troubles to Anti-Joke.Com and it's subsidiaries. For these reasons, Anti-Joke.Com will not allow it to be shown.

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Hey dude, wanna come with me!!!! Sure, where? ON YOUR FACE!!!!!! -_- ........ok sure why not

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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