How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

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I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

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Knock knock! Ding dong.

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How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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