How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

9

girls lacrosse

What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

what goes up and down , and left and right all day without breaking a sweat? A compass, get your mind out of the gudder.

what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

How do you kill a blonde? There are countless ways to complete such a task all of which have infinite variations.

I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

how come the jews were not laughing? because they were in a concentration camp

Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...