how do you make a orange juice. get orange juice and pour it in a cup.

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

why did the fat guy become fat ...COD..

A man walks into a bar. Wait, no, it was a horse. A man walks into a horse

How do you know that you tv has been stolen? It's no longer there.

Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

How do you make a mimer to speak? Shot him in both knees and cut of he's ear

Your mother's so fat, her blood type was Ragu

A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

What do you call a black priest who's name is John? Father John

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she get up? She had no legs. *Knock knock* Who's there? Not Suzie.

why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

Why didn't the caterpillar turn into a butterfly? Because it was a cheeto

why doesnt jesus play hockey? he got nailed to the boards

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a registered sex offender.

Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

poo is yummy

A whale's vagina

Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

Do you know what color comes after 9?

A woman walks into a bar and hits it off beautifully with the young man sitting close to her. They exchange numbers, and even a small kiss before she departs. He follows her home and eats her.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

Did you hear about Big Chief Running Water? Probably not. Indoor plumbing was invented after Europeans murdered his ancestors.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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