Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

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Chuck Norris screams in pain.

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How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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Hey, you know what sucks about being blind? You can see.

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Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

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Hey, Max!!

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What's inside that man's house? Atoms.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

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you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

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what do you call a dead black man? dead

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Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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There are two muffins in an oven. The first muffin says, "Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?". The second one says, "Hey, look! A talkin' muffin!".

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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Where do black people ride bicycles? In the Pedestrian Zone.

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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What do fish and dogs have in common they are both animals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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