A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

Q:What's the difference between a turtle and a cat? A: One's a turtle and the other is a cat....

Gary Busey walk into a bar. Everyone Ran out noticing the potential danger.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What is worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? 1 dead babies in 10 trees.

what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

I died shortly after writing this.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms; *knock knock*, Who's There? Not Sally.

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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