Who is the fiercist Raptor of them all? Matt Daly

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

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An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

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A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench. A bench is wooden while a black guy has a human body composed of mostly water.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? .

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What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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Obama

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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There once was a man from nantucket. But he moved to California after he won the State lottery.

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Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

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A man sat on a chair

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Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

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A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

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What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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How long would it take for a clock to reach 12 It depends on which 12 it is going to land on and which time zone you are in but yet most clocks are not correct so it is very hard to tell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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