When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You have been brought down to hell where you are welcomed by satan. "Welcome to hell, where you watch your loved ones get tortured for all eternity" Satan said "Where is everyone? " you ask "Hmmm, I guess you were never really loved"He replied

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the man walk into the bar? Because he wasn't looking where he was going

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

thumb_up thumb_down -11

(Put joke here)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Loner.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops