How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I had my period 3 days ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened to the short kid on april 30th: His girlfriend broke up with him

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You're*

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

thumb_up thumb_down +11

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A-B-C-D-E-F-G-R-U-D-T-F With me

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops