Do you want to hear a good knock knock joke? Okay, you start.

What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

roses are cows violets are oranges im mental are you too

What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

Jaden McMichael

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

Male penises.

girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

Ted Haggard.

a cat a dog and a penis meet up. The cat said ur lucky, when you have to pee u can go wherever you want. the dog said your lucky you can go in a litter box. the penis said your lucky u dont have to put a ballon over your head and do pushups till you throw up!!!

What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

BenWuzHear

Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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