- Anti Joke

A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

Two mooses were sitting in a tree, minding their own business, when suddenly a submarine came flying. "He probably lives here." The first moose said to the other.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! ba dum chzz

A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

Are u that bald or is your neck blowing bubbles.

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

Brothers and sisters,I have none. But my sister's daughter is also my daughter...

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you call a crocodile in a dentist? I have no idea, but I'd hate to be that dentist.

A blonde woman walked into a bar. She ordered a scotch.

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

I have a black guy in my family tree? Yea, his still hanging their

Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

insert joke here

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

Two mooses were sitting in a tree, minding their own business, when suddenly a submarine came flying. "He probably lives here." The first moose said to the other.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! ba dum chzz

for keeps?

A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

Are u that bald or is your neck blowing bubbles.

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

Brothers and sisters,I have none. But my sister's daughter is also my daughter...

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

Kendall and Nick Fredick

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

What do you call a crocodile in a dentist? I have no idea, but I'd hate to be that dentist.

A blonde woman walked into a bar. She ordered a scotch.

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

I have a black guy in my family tree? Yea, his still hanging their

Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

*insert joke here*

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

Two mooses were sitting in a tree, minding their own business, when suddenly a submarine came flying. "He probably lives here." The first moose said to the other.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

for keeps?

A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

Are u that bald or is your neck blowing bubbles.

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

Brothers and sisters,I have none. But my sister's daughter is also my daughter...

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

Kendall and Nick Fredick

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

insert joke here

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! ba dum chzz