How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thermodynamics?

What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

fatest boner fatest boner fatest boner to adam ramsden

Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies? You can't buy a bakers dozen of dead babies at Tim Hortons.

Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

Q: Why were the chicken and the cow friends? A: Because they shared common interests.

Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

So an Indian walks into a bar and says: ? ?? ??? ?????? ??? ??? ? ??? ??? ??????

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

Think of your favorite joke. Thats so weird! Thats exactly the same as this joke!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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