a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

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knock knock come in

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What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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Land Rovers

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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Why do people read Bibles? To learn about God.

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Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

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Man: Are you tired Woman: No why? Man: You have bags under your eyes and you just yawned a minute ago

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Is this where I type the joke?

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dick in your mouth just kidding haaaaaa

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Knock Knock! The man inside chooses not to answer the door and the caller walks away.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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what did the pregnant black woman say to the white man I'm pregnant

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

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Pickles

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

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Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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