What's worse than having a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he was hit by a truck.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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What did the Hobo get for Christmas? Nothing,He celebrated Hanukkah.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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cool story bro. tell it again. tell it at a party.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Whos breath stinks and mas in jail. Bomber Neville

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Why wasn't the woman cooking in the kitchen? Both her hands had been cut off in a severe conveyor belt accident.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

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What do get when you cross a lion and tiger? A liger. This hybrid mammal, only observed in captivity, is the largest of all known felines and is thought to be sterile.

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

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How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

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A Jew, a Mormon, and an Atheist walk out of a bar. They all get in a car with the Jew driving. They were all deceased do to the fact of a very large car accident. Know your limits. Don't drink and drive!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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