Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

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Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

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ONE DAY THE SKY OPENS AND SUDDENLY Gad: Jews, you are my chosen people! Jews: YAY! GODS CHOSEN! WE ARE GONNA BATHE IN RICHES AND YOU WILL COMMAND US TO RAID AND RAPE LANDS! FOR OURSELVES! AND EVERYTHING! Gad: Eh... Well, actually I was thinking more like... Jews: YAY WE ARE GONNA CONQUER THE WORLD! GAD IS WITH US NAO! Right Gay? I mean Gad... Cough... Gad: Err, well *cough* suuure, I mean... Jews: YAY! WE ARE GADS CHOSEN! WE ARE GONNA GET MIGHTY! Moral: "You do not want to be "Gods chosen" people!" Btw, you telling me Jewsus was not a Jew? Hmm?

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Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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Cows go moo.

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Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

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Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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Why can't Helen Keller hear or talk straight? Because she's dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

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whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

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what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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