How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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Why did the black man cry? He had no rights.

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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How did Swiper steal Dora's stuff? He shot her and then took her backpack.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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Why does Danny work at the factory? Because Danny is in an substantial economic crisis, and doesn't have enough money to afford food for his 6 kids and wife. They will all most likely die soon, as his factory job will not provide enough money.

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how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

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Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

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How do you stop a car? Put on the Brake

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What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

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How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

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What do you call a black man with a group of 5 white guys? Friends. What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys? a diffrent ratio of black and white friends.

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Q: What's big, brown, and smell like crap? A: Turd.

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Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Irrelevant. The road is no place for chickens.

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why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

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Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops