What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

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69

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Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

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Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

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I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

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What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

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Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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Why was Martin Luther King Jr. Shot? Because he was black.

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

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Why did the car stop. someone threw a cow at it.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

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How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops