What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

9/11

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

justin bieber

A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

Hashtag

What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

Listen Nero, lol "listen", anyway, you seem pretty quick to take the blame for my mistakes here, I mean sigh... ...I would never send anyone to harass anyone, but then again I should never allowed them to join in the first place, how bad is that eye doing by the way? I am deeply sorry, I never meant for anything like this to happen. I am eating as I write, I mean I am still scared, I would not blame you if you still keep burning anger towards me.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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