a man walked into a bar "ouch"

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

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There's no "i" in tim.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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