A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

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A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What has 5 legs, 4 eyes, and 8 stomachs? Nothing.

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What is brown and sticky?

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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roses are red, violets are violet

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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