What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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The Holocaust

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

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Paul Dylan King!

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops