96

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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memes

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And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

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How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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2

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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