what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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Poopsack Jones

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Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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Penis in a box.

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

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ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

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... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

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Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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