What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

Your moms so fat, she's not skinny

Do you know how I know that you're gay? You told me you are gay.

What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

i dislike sack in my mouth

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What's funnier than a dead baby? We'll.. Pretty much everything I can think of.

Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

Whats big, brown and can jump really high... A kangaroo

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

What should I name my dog?

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What abou three times

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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