why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

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A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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potato farming

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maddie latino

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

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i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

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What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

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whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

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The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

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YOLO

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Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

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What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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