How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

is mayonnaise an instrument?

A man walks into a bar.

What sucks?

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

Period Blood

How did the blond's brain cells die? She had a very acute case of Parkinson's disease.

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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