Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

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Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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like my drawing of a white person?

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A black man and an asian woman have a baby. Then a hispanic and a native american have a baby. Their babies have a baby. What is the baby? Society's worst nightmare.

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

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HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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