Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. It's funny because the robot has no arms.

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What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

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What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

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Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

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Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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Wy do boys like big butts ? Cause it goes in easy :.:

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Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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A man farted. Another man walked away.

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Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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