Dwarf Shortage

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

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Whats fat and gay joe diragi

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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