What's worse than dieing? Not much.

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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