Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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These Jokes suck.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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