Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

What is green and is not grass A frogg

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

Mom says my name I reply Coming.

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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