Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

12 in general

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

what's funny about war? nothing!

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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