What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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Why did the man go to Cantabria, Spain? Because he liked potatoes... jk

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How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

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How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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So there we were, climbing Mount Kjerag and we take a break. So I decided to tell you a joke. "Isn't this nice, just hanging around? See it's funny because we're suspended over 1000 metres in the air by our harnesses, except that you're not because I cut yours and now you're falling and you're gonna die." But I had done all that before I told you the joke so you didn't hear me and now I'll have to cut my harness and try to catch up to you so I can repeat myself. Great job, ya prick.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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