A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How old are you? 7

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops