Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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You know whats annoying? Steve

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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