Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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. . I am a whale

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops