what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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