A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Golf.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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