Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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These Jokes suck.

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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