Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

civil rights

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

a

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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